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You cannot depend on much in life, certainly not the weather forecast, but in this instance there was no call for complaint when yesterday dawned.
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Is not brightness the more magnificent, when you’ve been conditioned for gloom?
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Clouds lingered in fetching ways as we set off for Clifton Park.
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A stiff breeze riffled the surface of ponds.
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Golden light flooded the landscape which is gaining colour by the day.
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It’s good to see light beyond darkened woods.
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It was back to the pain clinic for a follow up to a recent nerve ablation.
Such treatments have been very helpful and so was this one – for two or three days, after which it felt as if a different problem had cropped up, causing further neck pain.
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A chiropractor told me half my life ago that I had military neck, meaning too rigid. Thereafter, it was bad discs and muscle spasms, due in part to cradling a telephone against my shoulder.
Would I be given a solution for the new pain at this appointment?
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As I’ve mentioned before, my pain management doctor is a lovely man who has provided much relief to my assortment of problems. His smile alone is a help – such is the effect of empathy!
A doctor’s attitude makes such a difference…
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But here’s the thing:
After the initial meeting with the doctor in which he evaluated my case and determined what could be done, I was to have no further access to him except through an assistant.
For four years, this worked splendidly.
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Then one day, I was ushered into a different room and seen by a new assistant. When it happened a second time, I was told that the lady I had been working with so successfully had left the practice.
There is no requirement for it, but in my experience when such changes occur, you are usually notified.
In my newly adjusted mind-set, I decided I must be open-minded and positive. No reason to believe this would be bad.
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The first thing that happened was a slowing down of the system, a longer wait for treatment.
This, I told myself, was because I was doing better and being less needy, I’d dropped out of the sequence.
Then came a new issue with insurance paperwork, previously dealt with by the business office. It was placed back on me, never mind that it is the business office that provides the codes which are the source of the problem.
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In due course, a letter informed me that Medicare had determined they would not be paying for a treatment, but also that it was not my responsibility.
Which was nice to know, but presumably meant that such procedures in the future would be and therefore not affordable.
As yet, no-one has mentioned it.
Medical coding is diabolical. There are dozens of codes, but selecting the one which is deemed appropriate is cloaked in mystery, offering convenient deniability.
But, there being nothing I can do about that, I plod on and will see what happens next.
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Which brought me to yesterday morning’s encounter, which is hard to put in a nutshell.
The medical assistant’s main focus seemed to be the perceived success of that last treatment and she appeared disappointed in my responses to her quite pointed questions.
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What had I resumed doing, that I had been unable to achieve because of pain? Social activity? Sport…?
Well, nothing. I do what I do, regardless. Pain relief just makes life less tedious, but that answer is not satisfactory.
Like so much else in the USA, evaluation is all important and multiple choice and my answer was not on offer.
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So I got what I interpreted as a scowl, after which the new pain was considered by the woman poking at my neck and scolding when I turned my head the wrong way.
Again – my interpretation.
Therefore, the poor attitude possibly my imagination.
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“It’s muscular. You need physical therapy.”
(ie: “not from us“)
“And use cold compresses.”
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She marched out to fetch a printout of the demand for therapy, which she trust in my hand before abruptly dismissing me.
Now, she is the professional, so I’m not saying she is wrong, but in the past, physical therapy has only caused me more pain without long term benefit and what has so far helped me has been moist heat.
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So, I came away from the appointment feeling a little less than sanguine, which was not ameliorated on the way home, by picking up a prescription which turned out to be the wrong one.
Additionally, it was a prescription that had been auto-filled, one I had decided to live without, now that DT has arranged for it to cost seven times more.
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The price of drugs angers me. I am fortunate to be able to manage without – indeed I have found myself far better off without those chemicals in my body – but there are many who are dependent on their prescriptions and are now suffering needlessly.
It is an outrage, just one of many the current government is guilty of.
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One way and another, it was not a very pleasing morning and I was grinding my teeth a bit.
But…
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We had sunshine vs rain…
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…spectacular clouds…
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..a day that defied bad moods.
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Any day that offers me pictures is a good day, with things to be grateful for.
While I do not turn my head from all that is wrong, I have to enjoy whatever I can, while I can.
We can preserve our good times as an antidote to those that are less so.
Can’t we?
There must be many reasons why you chose to remain and live out your life in America, and they are none of my business. But the healthcare sytem there must surely have been a red flag to getting older in a country that only cares abour profiteering from the sick and injured? I care about you a lot, and it grieves me that you have to tolerate a system that lets you live in pain, and charges you a small fortune to try to minimise that.
Best wishes, Pete.
The main reason – being stuck! I would have left without question if it had been possible, if I hadn’t been tied, had responsibilities, – if I’d had the possibility of employment etc etc etc. Moving cross-country I could manage, to another country very difficult unless you have a support system. It touches me that you care, Pete. Thank you. Many are so much worse off.
Thank you, Carolyn, for the beautiful photography of the sky, and this is one reason that living in such a beautiful place you find solace in difficult days.
Joanna
The more I learn about the health system/health insurance in America, the more I am thankful for the NHS with all its failings. Love and hugs to you Carolyn. I hope things improve regarding your pain management.
So sorry you are having to endure, suffer from, and attempt to navigate the care system that is designed primarily around cost reduction and not need not care.
Sending you best wishes as always.
Thank you Josie. My neighbour Ed had an appointment with the same woman the following day and quoted almost the same speech I got, so it wasn’t just me. he is a retired doctor and he thinks something is afoot. Nothing good, of course!
Beautiful pictures as ever. I truly hope you are feeling better soon. ‘Riffled’ by the way is a magnificent word and another one I intend to use as my own… 😉
It’s amazing how this is true in so many cases – a bad experience gets better (even sometimes forgotten for a while) when Nature shows us her beauty. I love your photos in this post! I hope your pain gets better/lessened/goes away💕.