Silences

0710/12th April 2022

We couldn’t have a vet visit totally without drama.

It wouldn’t feel right.

Grant gets very tense whenever there is anything going on with animals and I’ve learned to keep my mouth shut and await instructions.

“Toby won’t be a problem”, he announced, going off to search for Tinks who had fled when she heard a cage door rattle.

Toby was on my desk and probably I should have shoved him in a carrier there and then.

But I falsely (apparently) interpreted Grant’s remark to mean he would load Toby up once he had trapped Tinks.

So I let the boy slide off .

Explosive muttering ensued because by the time he tracked down and enclosed Tinks, it was getting late. Though we never are. Late.

For us ‘”late” is if we don’t have 15 minutes to spare.

We drove off in silence and I came to an interesting realization.

Such silences used to make my stomach churn.

My parents seldom argued, but when they did it was bitter and there followed periods of silence that were brittle. I hated it.

But those silences were nothing to what I would experience living with my aunt and uncle, largely because I was frequently involved in the argument.

Uncle did not allow non-participation.

You could get in trouble just for keeping your mouth shut. Or having the wrong sort of face.

Point is, I cannot abide fighting or raised voices, or those awful, tense silences.

This morning I think Grant was just grumpy and not really annoyed with me, but there was a time when driving off in silence as we did would have automatically caused stomach turmoil.

But it didn’t.

Anyone who suffers with anxiety, will appreciate the significance of such an important change!

Then, as we drove to the vet, Grant spotted wild turkeys in a field and conversation resumed.

No photograph, as the camera was not in hand, but I did send out a message to the turkeys, wishing them good day (you are supposed to do this with magpies, but I do it to any creature I happen upon).

“When are you coming back to my place?” I asked.

Last year we had a daily parade of turkeys:

Though I see from my photographs that they began visiting in June, not earlier as we had thought.

Sometimes they stopped for a rest.

While scrolling back and forth through my albums, I’ve remembered the other glitch in my upgraded Mac program. Photograph editing. Which would be why half my screen savers are displaying sideways, no doubt.

In frustration last night, I gave in to the perishing thing and said “right. Let’s have some different photographs then.”

So now I have sideways wind chimes.

Who do I complain to?

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