12th January 2021 Bleak, a good way to describe the way I felt yesterday. As hard as the sun struggled to brighten the day... ...grey cloud came to swallow it up... ...and my mood sank with it... ...not quite to despair, but certainly to tears and gloom. Returning to bed was an option, to wrap … Continue reading Bleak
Tag: anxiety
Monday thanks
First dawn picture Without a doubt, one of the things I am most grateful for is that quite suddenly and unaccountably, in June 2018, I spontaneously emerged from a years-long funk and made the decision to sell my over-sized house outside Seattle and return to New York. The decision to move to Seattle had been … Continue reading Monday thanks
Betwixt and between
Deptford pink It's one of those times of year. In between. Not this. Not that. Maybe it's me, but I find it unsettling. But then, right now, I find everything unsettling. The only thing to do is look to Nature. Which at the moment is also kind of betwixt and between. However, I still found … Continue reading Betwixt and between
Stormy weather
The height of our tornado It was ironic that my last post talked of owning twelve cats because that was the last day that I did. Own twelve cats. Now I only own eleven. This was our Colin last Summer. He loved arm chairs Colin loved to play He liked to meet people. He would … Continue reading Stormy weather
Dandelion day
... "Double bag it. Put it in the trash." So crass. Reminder of the dandelion, Under the West Seattle Bridge. Mud splattered, downtrodden, Ignored,unwanted, invisible. Except to me. ... The contents of the bag? Too sad, and such bad Timing Oxy withdrawal, Negative thoughts. ... How cruel Perverse timing can be. A sad event When … Continue reading Dandelion day
Making changes
In the event it could be helpful to someone else in a similar situation, let me "share" my experience with weaning off oxycodone so far. I'm not all the way there yet and the home stretch could be the really hard part. It depends, really, how many challenges you undertake at the same time, I … Continue reading Making changes
Venting spleen
If I could do it all again, I think I would choose to live alone, maybe with a goldfish. As far as I remember, goldfish don't make too much of a mess. And they are quiet. Living with other creatures is hard. It's a lot of work, if you hope to live in peace. Not … Continue reading Venting spleen
Small victories
Sometimes I ask myself why I live with so many cats. Why do I put myself through all the extra work, and accept the irritation they sometimes cause? Like stepping all over my keyboard! Mostly, I wonder, how many more times can I go through having one of them put to sleep? Colin is dying … Continue reading Small victories
No regrets
When I was finally free, at age 29, to live my life as I saw fit, more or less, I found that I had no social skills to guide me. I had not learned how to live among people my own age, for that matter, any age or class. I had no idea what was … Continue reading No regrets
Do small worries still matter?
Having a potentially sick cat in the house is always going to distract me from anything else that's going on. It's one of those things, where you know something is up, but the cat is not telling you. You just know. He looks sad. He looks depressed. Grant says his eyes are sunk. 😦 Anyway … Continue reading Do small worries still matter?