After due consideration, I arrived at the conclusion that weaning off oxycodone is returning me to my natural state, that being bad-tempered bitch.
For reason unknown (I don’t want to know), I thought it was “cool” to have a fiery temper when I was young.
Perhaps it was a way of getting attention. I also, when I was in a better mood, used to play the class clown.
None of which I am at all proud of now.
And when I was very little, at my very first school, I once wet my pants, creating a puddle on the floor.
I’ve never forgotten the look on the janitor’s face.
So, every time one of the cats pees on something unauthorized, I think of it as Sharp’s Revenge.
I thought by now I would be forgiven.
Now that’s a story I’ve never confessed before.
These days, I really don’t want to be bad tempered and “touchy”. That would make me like my father.
Grant says he feels like he has to walk on eggshells around me at the moment.
While vicariously, it amuses me, I don’t want to be like this. I’ve lived with people who take everything you say the wrong way, and it’s a pain.
You never know where you are. Or which side is up.
While it can be entertaining to keep people guessing, it’s really not nice.
And I wouldn’t want to be not-nice.
Surprisingly, when this morning was a bit of a bust, I took it in stride. I was scheduled for an MRI of my spine. For the umpteenth time. New provider…da de dum…
I’ve been told in the past they can’t do it because of the metal in my spine. I’ve also been told, “rubbish. Of course we can.“
Today we were back to “oops, the magnet is too powerful, we can’t do it”. But at least today they explained why and apologized and helped me work out what to do next…
Because the MRI is needed before the epidural can be done and also a covid test must be done 5 days before, so it all has to be co-ordinated.
Probably the look in my eyes must have said “help!” because the very nice technician took it upon herself to call the hospital which has a weaker magnet, and she got me an appointment tomorrow morning.
If I had tried to re-organize all of this on the phone myself, I hate to think where it would have ended. Besides, I needed to know whether to get the covid test. Or not.
With the crack-of-sparrow appointment for tomorrow confirmed, I could proceed with covid testing, except I would now be nearly 2 hours early. But the nice nurse was so helpful. And I didn’t react when she swabbed my throat.
Years ago, in the French convent, one of the nuns tried to swab my throat because I had an infection. I have, or had (has that changed too?) a terrible gag reflex, over which I had no control, so I hauled off and bashed the woman. Good job she was wearing a thick habit! She looked a bit stunned.
Everything about that English student was a bit odd.
As a result of re-scheduling, we arrived home early enough to provide on-time lunch for the cats. Who took it as a matter of course….
..after a stop at Walgreens to purchase Tiger Balm for my considerable aches from sitting in the car.
All of this running around to find alternatives to the oxy is totally counter-productive.
It really is so much easier to take a pill and continue with routine occupations rather than riding around in a car over bumpy roads.
It does feel a bit like my life has gone upside down.
Perhaps that’s my new normal.