Managing

It felt like the middle of the night when Lily’s pre-dawn wake-up wail sounded.

Most days I don’t mind responding to the summons. I didn’t mind today either, but it was a struggle, bad dreams have been ushering headaches of late.

It doesn’t take a degree in psychology to figure out that the dreams are related to current events, even though the scenario played out in my head last night was of the office where I once worked.

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The dream was of a bad situation unfolding due to the ineptitude of managers promoted beyond their competence, my efforts to rectify it falling on deaf ears.

People overseas are urging Americans to “do something!” Yes. Well, – what? How?

The very few actions of which I am capable have no effect whatever.

Attempts by our representatives to invoke the Constitution are ignored.

So. Frustration. Anxiety. Headaches.

“What do you complain about most?” asks the daily writing prompt.

Hmmm. Let me think…

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Lily’s wake-up calls are getting louder, possibly because she is deaf. She was always a talker with a voice rather like a Siamese, hard to ignore! She used to confine her talks to the basement, just as old Tom did. We joked that there was a cat ghost down there as we heard a couple of the others talking to it as well.

In recent months, though, Lily has spent much less time downstairs, likely because of arthritis in her legs and she has been singing a great deal. Often it is a demand for the kitchen tap to be turned on but mostly it is a long declaration of some sort.

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We try not to be disturbed, since it is nothing new, but it sometimes sounds so plaintive and occasionally Lily is very restless. She was always a very independent, self-contained little cat, but now she is more and more demanding of attention and I’ve come to recognise this as a sign of time running out.

Like humans, cats can develop dementia and we suspect this may be the case with Lily. When she wails so pitifully, I ask myself if she suffers. It is hard to estimate an animal’s physical suffering and when it comes to mental disturbance, there is simply no way of judging.

Lily’s latest blood test indicated very slight improvement. All we can do is monitor her closely, respond to her demands and love her.

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Anytime one cat’s behaviour changes, it affects the others.

As Lily has grown closer and more demanding of my attention, Willow has pulled back. It was only last year that she gained the confidence to sleep next to me at night, but now she has gone back to curling up in a box or on a chair.

Willow also used to follow me into the spare bedroom which is my dressing room and used to be our one more-or-less cat-free room. We enjoyed a few minutes then, of uninterrupted time together that was special.

But Little Man began demanding access and was Granted it which further led to Lily wanting to be allowed in and now Willow no longer follows me. Maybe she is less bothered by the loss of those moments than I am, but she is a sensitive creature. I try to pay her extra attention during the day and hope it is sufficient.

Even if I understand cats more, I am no better at managing their politics than the human kind.

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